Thursday, March 3, 2011

I do take two?

Thinking about renewing your vows?  Or having that wedding you never had?  Here are a few etiquette rules you should read up on from I DO! Take two!
  
Vow Renewals are not second weddings.

This an opportunity to reaffirm your marriage vows and love of one another, or perhaps a chance to have your marriage blessed by the church.

Bachelor / bachelorette parties?

These parties are typically thought of as your “last night out as a single person”, so, as tempting as it may sound, the fact is that the last hurrah ship sailed a long time ago. You are a married couple.

Shower with love, not with gifts.

When it comes to vow renewals, encourage friends and family to shower you with love and support, rather than gifts.

 Let your hair down.

The renewal ceremony is more of a simple, understated, private affair. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule. If you are recreating your original wedding ceremony, all bets are off.

 Attendants become attendees.

Did you realize that attendants are basically witnesses? it is better to simply invite them as guests.

The only thing given away is your love.
Fathers typically walk the bride down the aisle during weddings, this doesn't seem appropriate for vow renewals because the couple is already married.  When it comes to reaffirmation ceremonies, the husband and wife could walk the aisle together or she should walk alone. While the couple’s children and grandchildren accompany her down the aisle, a procession is not necessary for this ceremony.

The traditional reception dances will be different.
The father/daughter dance just doesn't seem right, does it? After all, the wife has been living with her husband for some time. So, while you many not want to include all those traditional dances as part of your reception, you could still dance a couple’s first dance which will signify the first dance of the next phase of their life together.

Not so much a wedding cake as an “anniversary’ type cake. 

The reaffirmation cake is sometimes recreated from the couple’s wedding, including the topper.  However, this should be more of an 'anniversary' type cake.  So, including writing on the cake would be appropriate.

Toss out the garter and bouquet toss.

You’re not alone if you find these traditions more than just a bit silly for a married couple.  Would you believe that both of these customs began as a way to keep wedding guests from tearing the bride’s clothes?!  It was viewed as good luck to snatch a piece of her clothing. Perhaps you can create a new tradition of your own, instead.

 ***Read up on your renewal, or second wedding before you start planning, you may be budgeting for things you just don't need! 


 

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